Jump on the Apple bandwagon this holiday with the iPig speaker dock, with five internal speakers, a remote control and pretty freaky eyes.

The coolest part is that you can adjust the volume levels with its ears. Adorable, right?

The new iPig is available to purchase here for only $119.99, and it even comes with an iPanda bear companion.

I’m not so hot about this idea: Nordic Rock Stone Ice Cubes, which are stone cubes (duh) that you throw in the freezer and then use in your drinks to keep ‘em cold.

The plus side is that they won’t dilute your drinks (cause they won’t melt) and the downside is that THEY’RE ROCKS.

Plus, I kind of like it when the ice melts and waters down my soda.

The Kitchen is currently holding a poll for your opinions about this, but I’m gonna say that it’s a pass.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought the whole motivation behind advancing technology is to make the process as small and as fast as possible. The thinner, the smaller, the faster, the sleaker, the better.

Right?  But please explain this to me why Japanese mobile phone provider, Willcom, recently demonstrated their latest invention, the Kuma Phone, which is basically a stuffed teddy bear cell phone. You simply insert your SIM card into the bear (hopefully in its butt) and then dial away.

You can save up to four speed dial numbers in the bear, one in each paw, which are activated by pinching internal sensors. It vibrates and makes custom noises for incoming calls, which can be answered and finished by pressing the tail.

This is great. Not only can I cuddle my new cell phone to sleep, but I can also look like a complete idiot by holding a giant stuffed animal to my head every time I get a call. I can also only save up to four phone numbers, which is perfect, because I only have four friends to call. Sign me up.

Apparently Willcom designed this concept phone to appeal to women, but I know I won’t be the first to say that this is the worst idea ever. You want to appeal to women? Stay away from the stuffed animals. We are not at a carnival. And we all do not collect Beanie Babies.

Like most people, I don’t like tongs. Luckily for me, my tong problem might be solved by a groundbreaking technology called “Fingertongs.”

Why don’t I like tongs? Lets start with bacon.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve burnt myself cooking bacon. Sometimes because I fumble with the tongs while flipping the bacon over, and sometimes I just can’t resist the bacony goodness and grab the sizzling buggers right out of the pan.

The embarrassment doesn’t end when I want to eat healthy. For some reason, it’s an epic struggle to pick up a single cherry tomato from the salad bar. I vainly fumble for minutes on end to grab the elusive scarlet fruit, while the hungry people in the line behind me seem to come to the conclusion that I lack the coordination to eat anything fancier than handfuls of dry oats.

This is where Fingertongs come in. They are “the silicone cooking tongs you wear”, which means you can just grab food, without having to actually burn yourself or touch asparagus.

Fingertongs  are kind of like a mitten, and it makes your hand look like the bill of a duck that has been deprived of oxygen. You can slip them on, and just grab food that’s heated up to 500 degrees F. It’s like having your own duck hand-puppet. Your own duck hand-puppet that helps you cook bacon!

And good news for you lefties: Fingertongs will fit you too. Sweet!

Do you dream of your own programmable tiny robot woman? Me neither, but if you did, you could buy one now, because the Femisapien is finally for sale.

Some of you might remember the Robospaien as a “hot” toy a few years ago. (confession, I briefly owned one of these) They still sell those, but now the lonely bachelor robot finally has a female counterpart. She can dance, so some backup singing, and apparently blow kisses. I don’t know how they do that without lips. It must be very advanced.

Since Wowwee, the maker of the robot, forgot to send us a Femisapien, I’ll have to rely on the review of the premier (and only?) robot review site robotsrule.com. They seem to like it.

Although, based on their name, they may be a bit biased.

In this video, watch how two Femisapiens mimic some normal woman behavior…by fighting with swords.